What was it?
an escape?
Meditation?
Adventure?
Solitude?
Desire?

     All of these questions I asked myself during the past weekend, a weekend like no other, 16th,17, and 18th of March I had the very first experience of camping in Cyprus. To be honest, it was the best weekend I ever had, but during that time, I tried my to spend some of the time alone, because you can only start thinking whenever you’re alone.

     We had an extreme hike, it was for 30-39km. We traveled from place to another, all by using our feet only. It really was wonderful, and very challenging. I really learned new things, experiences, met new people, and overall had a superb time. These are the answers to the very first question “What was it”.

     An escape from reality, and as the organizer said: "we escaped from civilization”. It really hit me hard the thought and the fact that I’m not in the city anymore, and I’m nowhere capable to escape this place (the place where we camped is called Karpaz). Did I escape from the city? from the people? or from the world? I started questioning myself, and not finding any answers, my head is so blurred, and my thoughts were very messed up. Till this day I just can’t get myself to work. Yet I discovered that I really needed this escape, to refocus & readjust myself.

     Was it’s sole purpose for meditating? It was extremely adventurous and tough for some, but for me, it was for  meditation. Challenges especially hard physical ones meditate me because through them I forget my surrounds and just focus on how much my body can give. Is it up for the challenge that it’s facing or not. Is it going to betray me or not? I’ve always been a physical person and likes all kind of sports, and I’ve always known that activity is my meditation. Is this why yoga was invented? I don't know. 

     The moment some of us hear the word camping, our minds immediately see it equivalent to adventure. The word adventure doesn't necessarily mean that it’s specifically for physical adventures. As a person who has OCD tendencies, it was quite an adventure to challenge myself and go through all the dirt, and having to use the mother nature for certain purposes. I learned that I can overcome anything, which was quite adventurous to forget about your home, and just live as one with nature.

     At some point I would leave everyone and go sit alone, or even head up in-front and like just a few steps away from the organizer/leader. I wanted these solo moments, more like I needed them. I'm a big believer is solitude, I’m a loner, and will always be one. I’ve learned that I live for independence, to the point were at some point I discovered that I don’t even need anyone. I’m a big girl, and after this camp, I really started believing in myself. The calmness, that you feel when you’re sitting alone, the sound of your surroundings, noises from others, and just enjoying your own company. Solitude is my biggest privilege that I've always appreciated and enjoyed.

     The desire you feel, from the place, is astonishing. I didn’t even want to go back. I know that the word desire has been stained with the sexual desire context, but the desire to live means a lot to me. The desire of understanding your friends more, the desire of weak a friend can be and learn about a whole new face. The desire of meeting new people, the desire of how accepting & understanding people can be, and finally the desire of helping one another. You see most of us forget that the word desire can fit in more context, than the sexual ones. I love desire.

     In the end, I learned that I was trying my best to keep myself inside a very unsafe box. There’s a very big world standing right in front each one of us. Believe in yourself, and in your body. Thrive for solitude, and start your journey. Best regards.

As you can see if you noticed, I’ve been updating my blog quite often. I’m even planning to do a full series for a week, which means every day there’s going to be a blog, but before we start with that one, I want to post this blog that I’ve written back during 17th summer.

Without further due, let’s move into the topic.

Did any of you ever hear of Trial&Error? Well apparently some did, some didn’t.

Let’s start with the meaning.
: finding out the best way to reach a desired result or career solution by trying out one or more methods or means and by noting and eliminating errors or causes of failure.

Let’s summarize it.
The trying of one thing or another until something succeeds.

There are always specific behaviors; sometimes we do them out of habit, or under particular circumstances. Over here we will mention few behaviors that we should try to eliminate or let’s say reduce.

Judging.

Y’all need to chill for God’s sake and stop judging every single person that walks right past you. I mean judging is somehow like karma, the more you judge, the more people will judge you.

Judging others sometimes just shows how insecure we are about ourselves. I’m not saying that am an angel that doesn’t judge others, I do judge, and am trying to stop that habit. Trust me you will be capable of sleeping peacefully the moment you stop bothering yourself in every single thing surrounding you. 

I’ve come to notice, that the less we judge, the happier we are. I have quite an experience this past semester, with people judging me due to hearing the one side of the story, and then the moment they hear the other part, they realize how mistaken they were for judging too early. But, notice they still took the effort to digging more and hearing the other side. You see we have no idea why does that person look like shit today, maybe he woke up late and rushed? We have no idea why she’s wearing those clothes, backside wardrobe clothes? Due to an excessive amount of laundry that has to be washed?? 

You see we have no idea what is going on with the other side. Try instead of judging, try understanding. 


Anger.

Unfortunately for this behavior, I had to learn it the hard way. I had to learn how to keep myself calm because I don’t get angry, I rage. Not only me, most of us do, but after some experience here and there, I have learned that there’s a different type of anger. Some people are more like easily pissed, which leads to immediate anger. While others are the type that gets angry, but don’t show it until it keeps building up, and then it turns into rage. It takes quite some time to hold your composure in a tough situation, but let me give this trick.

Put this in your head; nothing deserves in this world for you to get angry at, you’re a human being that is worth much better, and much more. He? She? Who do they think they are? Don’t feed em the anger, they want. You know what pisses someone the most? Cold treatment. Ohh my cold little heart.

Just let it go, and don’t bother with everything around you, I mean come on. Life is short, for us to worry about every little detail here and there. Trust me again; you’re the only one who will get a headache. SO just let silly things go.

You see anger is not always the solution, instead try to stay silent in tough situations, because silence speaks more than words.


Idleness. 

Laziness is something we all face nowadays, and most of us can’t even understand how. It just comes sometimes for a day, week, month, and year. Or let’s say some of us are just born that way. But, here’s the thing would lay on the bed all day long get you anywhere? Are you going to achieve anything other than hurting you back, or your body being overall numb? Some of us even gain weight, due to overeating while binge watching. Let’s face it; we need to move our asses to achieve great things, now or late, we need to be more active and motivated. Even if we can’t find it now, it’s all about thriving for finding this treasure. We need to move forward, instead of laying back and watching things move while we are still idle. 

Read, watch, make, draw, create, etc. Things that would help you to make you a better person, for yourself before others, or society. Are you sure that you want to leave this world without anything on your record? Idolizing lazinesses is nothing but a failure, for us. We need to start supporting each other and make this world a better place. 

You see Idleness is just a status that you can always change, into busy because you have work to do.


In conclusion, as you can see, I was trying to use different methods on how we can change things, which happen to be behaviors. We can’t give up that easily, guys we are the future. Believe in yourselves, support yourself, and tap your shoulder now and then. Because you deserve it.